A few days after Christmas, a mother working in her kitchen was listening to her small son playing with his new train in the adjoining room. She heard the train stop and the son say
â??All you sons of bitches who want off, get the hell off right now as this is the last stop, and all you sons of bitches who are getting on, get your asses in the goddam train cause weâ??re leaving!!â?
Train Ride
lol 
Heres one...
The farmer's son wakes up in the morning and comes down to eat breakfast. The farmer walks in and tells the boy that he won't get no breakfast until he goes out and feeds the pig and chicken and then milk the cow.
The boy is upset at this news as he is hungry, but he starts out for the barn to attend to the animals all the same. He goes to feed the Chicken and thinks to himself "Stupid Chicken" then kicks it. Then he gets to the pig of which he thinks "Stupid Pig" then kicks it.
Finally he comes to the Cow which he milks and then thinks "Stupid Cow" and kicks it as well. Finally he returns to the house where his mother is standing in the kitchen. By now he has worked up quite a hunger and he quickly sits down at the table for breakfast only to find an empty plate.
He looks at his mother and asks "Whats this, wheres my Bacon, eggs & milk?!?". She looks at him sternly and tells him that she had seen what he had done out at the barn to the animals. She saw that he had kicked the chicken, so he wouldn't get any eggs. She saw that he had kicked the pig, so he wouldn't get any bacon. She also saw him kick the cow, so he wouldn't get any milk.
Just then the farmer walks in for breakfast and accidentally kicks the cat. The boy turns to his mother and says "Should I tell him, or will you?".
Spoiler:<font color="#000000">Nickname for a Cat, you figure it out</font>
Heres one...
The farmer's son wakes up in the morning and comes down to eat breakfast. The farmer walks in and tells the boy that he won't get no breakfast until he goes out and feeds the pig and chicken and then milk the cow.
The boy is upset at this news as he is hungry, but he starts out for the barn to attend to the animals all the same. He goes to feed the Chicken and thinks to himself "Stupid Chicken" then kicks it. Then he gets to the pig of which he thinks "Stupid Pig" then kicks it.
Finally he comes to the Cow which he milks and then thinks "Stupid Cow" and kicks it as well. Finally he returns to the house where his mother is standing in the kitchen. By now he has worked up quite a hunger and he quickly sits down at the table for breakfast only to find an empty plate.
He looks at his mother and asks "Whats this, wheres my Bacon, eggs & milk?!?". She looks at him sternly and tells him that she had seen what he had done out at the barn to the animals. She saw that he had kicked the chicken, so he wouldn't get any eggs. She saw that he had kicked the pig, so he wouldn't get any bacon. She also saw him kick the cow, so he wouldn't get any milk.
Just then the farmer walks in for breakfast and accidentally kicks the cat. The boy turns to his mother and says "Should I tell him, or will you?".
Spoiler:<font color="#000000">Nickname for a Cat, you figure it out
</font>
