haha!

Fusion pimp · Post by **Fusion pimp** » Wed May 25, 2005 12:44 pm

This was apparently in the Washington Post... the title of the article was
"Best Come Back Line Ever."

In summary, the police arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22 year old white
male resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin patch 11:38 p.m. on Friday.
Lawrence will be charged with lewd and lascivious behaviour, public
indecency, and public intoxication at the Gwinnett County courthouse on
Monday.
The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch he decided to
stop.
"You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one
around for miles. At least I thought there wasn't", he stated in a phone
interview. Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the
road,
picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purpose,
cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged "need." "Guess I was
really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment.
In the process, Lawrence apparently failed to notice a Gwinnett County
police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until officer
Brenda Taylor approached him.
"That was an unusual situation, that's for sure,"
said officer Taylor.
"I walked up to Lawrence and he's...just pumping away at this pumpkin."
Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Lawrence.
"I just went up and said, "Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you're
having sex with a pumpkin?".

He froze and was clearly very surprised that I was there, and then looked
me straight in the face and said ...

"A pumpkin? F*** me, is it midnight already?"

Sting_Ray · Post by **Sting_Ray** » Wed May 25, 2005 12:57 pm

Heh... Strange enough that would have been my response too.

Shawn, you need to call me bro... Same number, any time.

Fusion pimp · Post by **Fusion pimp** » Wed May 25, 2005 1:00 pm

Thought you were still in!?

Btw, my phone rings the same way yours does.

I'll buzz ya soon. Water's really high right now.

Scratch · Post by **Scratch** » Wed May 25, 2005 1:07 pm

Nice post Shawn. I laughed

Hattrick · Post by **Hattrick** » Wed May 25, 2005 1:18 pm

haha!

Hattrick · Post by **Hattrick** » Wed May 25, 2005 1:18 pm

haha!

wow havent double posted in quite awhile!

HaAGen DaZS · Post by **HaAGen DaZS** » Wed May 25, 2005 1:31 pm

Greg found it twice as funny as the rest of us!

had to think about it, but i got it

Krom · Post by **Krom** » Wed May 25, 2005 2:21 pm

Pun · Post by **Pun** » Wed May 25, 2005 2:32 pm

Sting_Ray · Post by **Sting_Ray** » Wed May 25, 2005 4:10 pm

Still in? And yeah, therein lies the problem. I'd've called you like 6 years ago, but my phone with your number on it is kinda dead... and at home. So yeah... that's why I need YOU to call ME

Case one for me =)

dissent · Post by **dissent** » Wed May 25, 2005 4:11 pm

Some day, some descendant is going to be looking in the newspaper, and will find this. Way to go Pat. You'll be famous. What a thing to be known for.

bash · Post by **bash** » Wed May 25, 2005 5:55 pm

http://www.snopes.com/risque/caught/pumpkin.htm Sorry, B. Anyway, why would he be screwing a carriage?

After all, that's what turns into a pumpkin at midnight.

TheCope · Post by **TheCope** » Wed May 25, 2005 6:04 pm

lol bash

dissent · Post by **dissent** » Wed May 25, 2005 9:36 pm

Hah! This man's progeny are saved from years of ridicule ...

... at least for now!

dissent · Post by **dissent** » Wed May 25, 2005 9:43 pm

Hah! This man's progeny are ...

treated to a double post!

MD-2389 · Post by **MD-2389** » Wed May 25, 2005 11:56 pm

I guess we'll find out in about nine months whether or not we'll have a new movie called "Attack of the Killer Pumpkins" on Scifi.

JMEaT · Post by **JMEaT** » Thu May 26, 2005 6:21 am

Holy crap, that is funny as hell.