http://www.theonion.com/content/node/39512
not exactly new, but i never saw it linked here. I only post this here due to the reaction to this thread.
so is this more \"fanaticism\"? more \"propaganda\"? is it \"vulgar\"? Am I the only one who finds it funny?
Joke? Why, yes it is!
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Richard Cranium
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Richard Cranium
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I love it. I just love it 
...Its stuff like this that will show people what \"ID\"...or now..\"IF\" really is doing to education. In fact, I can see Dembski watching this closely because if it takes off, he will jump on the bandwagon, write books about it, and claim it was his idea.
I also liked this quote the best.
...Its stuff like this that will show people what \"ID\"...or now..\"IF\" really is doing to education. In fact, I can see Dembski watching this closely because if it takes off, he will jump on the bandwagon, write books about it, and claim it was his idea.I also liked this quote the best.
BettinaWe just want the best possible education for Kansas' kids,\"
Re:
no kidding... i pick up the printed (yes they print it... can you beleive that?) copy at a local 'Noodles & Co.' by me all the time... gives me something to laugh at.Nirvana wrote:I'm surprised at how many of you don't know what the onion is... heh
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MD-2389
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Re:
Kinda like the one where Austrailia moved to the Atlantic?Birdseye wrote:This is genius. Very funny, they even quoted Newton. I can't believe how hard worked on some of their stories are.
"One spelling mistake can destroy your life. A Husband sent this to his wife : "I'm having a wonderful time. Wish you were her." - @RobinWilliams
I laughed at that, too, though for a totally different reason that you guys. For you, it's a parody of ID. For me, it's a parody of all the stupid things people say about ID.
-----------
More origins humor... (from this page, on which I don't get most of the jokes...)
How many 'emergent properties' advocates does it take to change a light bulb?
I decided not to use them, after interviewing them. I asked them if they could do it, and they said 'no problem--easy to do'. I asked them HOW they planned to do it, and they said they would simply start the house on fire, then wait for the heat to raise the temperature of the light bulb until it reached a far-from-equilibrium state, and that then 'new bulb properties' would emerge (but that we would have to keep an intense fire burning in the room forever--to sustain the emergent property). So, I have them a false address and left...
How many fractal mathematicians does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but, good grief! I let him into the house to start working on the bulb, and by the time I got back later that day, the single 110V bulb had changed into a 6 level chandelier, with each level a smaller replica of the previous level...my energy bills are going to kill me!
How many self-organizing theorists does it take to change a light bulb?
They say only one or two, but they refuse to do it unless I can get the media somehow excited about it...
How many people from the Santa Fe Institute does it take to change a light bulb?
Probably only a couple, but they can't seem to get a repair team organized.
.......................................................................................................
(towards the interest of fairness and 'equal time'...smile):
How many Intelligent Designers does it take to change a light bulb?
Looks like I'll never know--I asked some to do this simple task, and they started talking about how this 'simple task' was actually composed of many, many sub-tasks, each of which ITSELF was composed of many, many sub-sub-tasks, each of THESE of which was ITSELF composed of many, many sub-sub-sub-tasks, each of THESE...I think they are up to 10^5 \"subs\" now...a living fractal, how kewl...(wish I could see them better in this darkness, though).
How many Intelligent Designers does it take to change a light bulb?
Good question, they don't know yet...every time I ask them about changing the bulb, they keep telling me that they'll have a process and programme worked out \"real soon\"...[\"Where are we going?\"...\"Planet Ten!\"...\"When are we going?\"...\"Real Soon!!\"...]
...............................................................................................
How many Richard Dawkinses does it take to change a light bulb?
He won't do it--He cannot see enough similarities between himself and the bulb.
(or a more 'abusive' version...smile)
How many Richard Dawkinses does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, and he does it INSTANTLY, recognizing his close genetic similarity with an object that no longers sheds any light...(ouch, see, i told you it was semi-abusive)
How many Richard Dawkinses does it take to change a light bulb?
One, and he said he would be here a year ago, but he hasn't shown. He went off to climb some mountain somewhere, and apparently it's taking him a lot longer than he originally thought...
How many Richard Dawkinses does it take to change a light bulb?
I doubt we'll never know. Seems he was hospitalized with multiple injuries in a mountaineering accident recently. Was climbing some mountain somewhere, when a nearby bird sneezed, the minute sound vibrations of which moved a tiny piece of grass one-half millimeter, which shifted a micro-breeze a tiny fraction, which blew a cubic centimeter of dirt out from under a rock, accidentally setting off a catastrophic avalanche. Freakish accident, really--the chances of that happening were 1 in 10^18th or something like that...But I guess it was inevitable....I guess we really shouldn't be surprised by it, after all...
How many Richard Dawkinses does it take to change a light bulb?
According to his computer similuation, it only takes twelve of his cells--but he said I would have to be really, really patient.
How many Richard Dawkinses does it take to change a light bulb?
He wont' commit to even doing it until he interviews everybody in the building. He muttered something about seeing how 'like himself' they were, before he would help them...
How many Richard Dawkinses does it take to change a light bulb?
Probably only one, but he is so distracted trying to figure out if the chances of his genes (or those of his relatives) are likely to propagate more in the dark, or in the light, that I cannot get him to act...Theorists!!!
How many Richard Dawkinses does it take to change a light bulb?
Can't say--he refuses to do it. Says that since other gene-bearing agents before him have not changed it SO FAR, then apparently it would not be good to change it at all...genes don't lie, you know...
How many Natural Selectionists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Well actually, we won't even TRY to change the bulb. We will simply stop using the room that has the burned out bulb, and start using only rooms with FUNCTIONING bulbs. That way, over time, ....
How many punctuated equilibrists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Actually, they say it cannot be done-at least not for large light bulbs. But, on the other hand, very very small bulbs-like those in miniature Christmas trees-CAN be changed, but ONLY if they are placed in some very isolated spot (like a shoe box under the bed). The good news is that, if the conditions are right, these little bulbs change VERY RAPIDLY! (The bad news is they may not be bulbs when they're done.)
How many evolutionists does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one (to aim the x-ray machine) but the bulb changes very, very slowly
How many Creation Scientists does it take to change a light bulb?
Two: one to change it quickly, and one to point out that no transitional forms occurred at all.
-----------
More origins humor... (from this page, on which I don't get most of the jokes...)
How many 'emergent properties' advocates does it take to change a light bulb?
I decided not to use them, after interviewing them. I asked them if they could do it, and they said 'no problem--easy to do'. I asked them HOW they planned to do it, and they said they would simply start the house on fire, then wait for the heat to raise the temperature of the light bulb until it reached a far-from-equilibrium state, and that then 'new bulb properties' would emerge (but that we would have to keep an intense fire burning in the room forever--to sustain the emergent property). So, I have them a false address and left...
How many fractal mathematicians does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but, good grief! I let him into the house to start working on the bulb, and by the time I got back later that day, the single 110V bulb had changed into a 6 level chandelier, with each level a smaller replica of the previous level...my energy bills are going to kill me!
How many self-organizing theorists does it take to change a light bulb?
They say only one or two, but they refuse to do it unless I can get the media somehow excited about it...
How many people from the Santa Fe Institute does it take to change a light bulb?
Probably only a couple, but they can't seem to get a repair team organized.
.......................................................................................................
(towards the interest of fairness and 'equal time'...smile):
How many Intelligent Designers does it take to change a light bulb?
Looks like I'll never know--I asked some to do this simple task, and they started talking about how this 'simple task' was actually composed of many, many sub-tasks, each of which ITSELF was composed of many, many sub-sub-tasks, each of THESE of which was ITSELF composed of many, many sub-sub-sub-tasks, each of THESE...I think they are up to 10^5 \"subs\" now...a living fractal, how kewl...(wish I could see them better in this darkness, though).
How many Intelligent Designers does it take to change a light bulb?
Good question, they don't know yet...every time I ask them about changing the bulb, they keep telling me that they'll have a process and programme worked out \"real soon\"...[\"Where are we going?\"...\"Planet Ten!\"...\"When are we going?\"...\"Real Soon!!\"...]
...............................................................................................
How many Richard Dawkinses does it take to change a light bulb?
He won't do it--He cannot see enough similarities between himself and the bulb.
(or a more 'abusive' version...smile)
How many Richard Dawkinses does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, and he does it INSTANTLY, recognizing his close genetic similarity with an object that no longers sheds any light...(ouch, see, i told you it was semi-abusive)
How many Richard Dawkinses does it take to change a light bulb?
One, and he said he would be here a year ago, but he hasn't shown. He went off to climb some mountain somewhere, and apparently it's taking him a lot longer than he originally thought...
How many Richard Dawkinses does it take to change a light bulb?
I doubt we'll never know. Seems he was hospitalized with multiple injuries in a mountaineering accident recently. Was climbing some mountain somewhere, when a nearby bird sneezed, the minute sound vibrations of which moved a tiny piece of grass one-half millimeter, which shifted a micro-breeze a tiny fraction, which blew a cubic centimeter of dirt out from under a rock, accidentally setting off a catastrophic avalanche. Freakish accident, really--the chances of that happening were 1 in 10^18th or something like that...But I guess it was inevitable....I guess we really shouldn't be surprised by it, after all...
How many Richard Dawkinses does it take to change a light bulb?
According to his computer similuation, it only takes twelve of his cells--but he said I would have to be really, really patient.
How many Richard Dawkinses does it take to change a light bulb?
He wont' commit to even doing it until he interviews everybody in the building. He muttered something about seeing how 'like himself' they were, before he would help them...
How many Richard Dawkinses does it take to change a light bulb?
Probably only one, but he is so distracted trying to figure out if the chances of his genes (or those of his relatives) are likely to propagate more in the dark, or in the light, that I cannot get him to act...Theorists!!!
How many Richard Dawkinses does it take to change a light bulb?
Can't say--he refuses to do it. Says that since other gene-bearing agents before him have not changed it SO FAR, then apparently it would not be good to change it at all...genes don't lie, you know...
How many Natural Selectionists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Well actually, we won't even TRY to change the bulb. We will simply stop using the room that has the burned out bulb, and start using only rooms with FUNCTIONING bulbs. That way, over time, ....
How many punctuated equilibrists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Actually, they say it cannot be done-at least not for large light bulbs. But, on the other hand, very very small bulbs-like those in miniature Christmas trees-CAN be changed, but ONLY if they are placed in some very isolated spot (like a shoe box under the bed). The good news is that, if the conditions are right, these little bulbs change VERY RAPIDLY! (The bad news is they may not be bulbs when they're done.)
How many evolutionists does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one (to aim the x-ray machine) but the bulb changes very, very slowly
How many Creation Scientists does it take to change a light bulb?
Two: one to change it quickly, and one to point out that no transitional forms occurred at all.
