Fetishism and The Bible

[Dakatsu]

Okay. Background story is I was dating this girl, blah blah blah. Anyway, we have been dating for a long time, and she comes up to me and says she is Breaking up. She loves me, every little detail about me. For what you may ask...

She says her parents forbid me to be with her because of one of my fetishes. I aint gonna tell you what fetishes I have, but anyway, she said that it was against their religion in her parents minds. Her family is roman catholic... Is there something that ACTUALLY says fetishes are forbidden in the catholic bible?

I know it says some extreme things, but is there actually something that says that fetishes are forbidden? It seems like a stupid question, but it may help me get this whole thing to blow over.

--Signed: Dakatsu.

[dissent]

I'm not sure if the word \"fetish\" appears anywhere in the Bible.

fetish - 1. A material object believed among primitive cultures to have magical powers. 2. An object of fetishism 3. An object of unreasonably excessive attention or reverence.

fetishism - 1. The worship of or belief in fetishes. 2. Excessive attention to or attachment for something. 3. Aberrant habitual sexual excitement associated with an inanimate object or body part.

However, there are certainly proscriptions against, for example, coveting. See the 10 Commandments and following. I can see where Catholics (and other Christians, and other religious and philosophical traditions, for that matter) would take issue with a fetish.

[Dakatsu]

I meant sexual fetish in case you didn't know:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_fetishism

[Samuel Dravis]

Ehhh, probably depends on what it is. I don't want to know, btw.

[Admiral Thrawn]

Well, personally, you have to consider what type of fetish it is and if the bible condemns that particular type of fetish. Everybody is turned on by something. Some may have a foot fetish, some may have a breast fetish. But what if the fetish was something that was rather unclean? I won't go into details on what comes to mind, but I think you guys can figure that out.

I don't ever remember the bible condemning being turned on by a physical attribute, but it does talk about uncleanlyness, and various other things. You really have to look at the fetish itself and see if it actually violates or condradicts bible teachings. But as far as fetishes in general, nothing I can think of. Although self control is a must.

What I DO find ironic though is that these people claim to be catholic and are trying to uphold bible teachings. So my question is this. Why was she sexually involved if she was so holy?

[Dakatsu]

We have some fun, we didn't exacly have sex every second, but she wasn't as pure as everyone thinks she is. She has made out with me and has had a little bit of fun with my particular fetish in not over sexual ways (No one had to get naked or anything). Her parents didn't care about me kissing her, just this one fetish. I don't think she would go to hell for it.

P.S.: I haven't read the bible, so that is why I am having a hard time on this.

[Bet51987]

Dakatsu. You told me in a game once that you were 13 years old, \"dating\" a 13 year old girl, and what one of your fetishes was. If its the same one, no, its not forbidden and IMHO what goes on behind closed doors is no business of the church. (I'm not talking about illegal sexual activites..like adult/minor).

Another thing is not to come on to a forum and say she isn't pure. She likes to have as much fun as you do and shouldn't be demeaned in any manner.

At her age, her parents have the right to know whats going on and she sounds like she has a good relationship with her parents. Their reaction may be more parental than religious in this case because they read about \"choking\" and \"sniffing\" games in the paper all the time so they may be putting you in that category.

Bee

[Dakatsu]

Click ONLY If You Plan On Helping Me!
Her parents knew about everything else we did. They knew we made out and did the things Bettina was thinking of. Like I said, she said it was something to do with religion, although I could of heard wrong. I just hope I can get an answer, and that I can get back with her again.

[Bet51987]

Click ONLY If You Plan On Helping Me!
Her parents knew about everything else we did. They knew we made out and did the things Bettina was thinking of. Like I said, she said it was something to do with religion, although I could of heard wrong. I just hope I can get an answer, and that I can get back with her again.

I can't help you because I'm not a parent. I just don't understand how a parent of a thirteen year old girl "knew" she was making out with you and doing the things that we were thinking about, but have a religious objection to only one part of all the things you were doing with her. If it was me, my dad would have filled you full of bullets.

If they just found out then it makes more sense to me. In this case, they are shocked and view you as a perverted child and want their daughter to keep away from you. If they are sensible parents then there is no out here for you.

I would like to know myself now if religion has any issues with foot fetishes. I don't belieive its an issue with them.

Bee

[Behemoth]

Stop downloading porn

[Shoku]

Like I said, she said it was something to do with religion,

If it did have something to do with religion, it may have something to do with the following:

1 Thessalonians 4:3-8:
"It is God's will that you should be holy; that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God, who gives you his Holy Spirit." NIV

Satisfying any sexual desire outside of marriage is a sin to God. Making out is not avoiding sexual imorality, it is feeding passionate lust. If her parents are religious, they may want to keep her away from you, not just because of your fetish, but because of your encouraging her to engage in immoral conduct.

[Dakatsu]

I will talk to my girlfriend (er, ex-girlfriend) on Monday when I go back to school. I hope I can get more information. I do find it odd they let me make out with her, let her hit me, but not shrimping... I hope this is all just a misunderstanding, or something on those lines.

[DCrazy]

Boinking at firteen? Eek...

[Top Gun]

I had to look up the term \"shrimping\" on the Wiki (and unfortunately came across a rather graphic...alternate...definition ). No offense to you, but I think that almost any parents would have a problem with someone doing that to their daughter, especially at the young age you're at, considering the nature of the act. As for any moral question, it's probably along the lines of what Shoku said; Catholics view any sexual activity outside of marriage as immoral. Her parents may not consider making out as sexual activity (we'll leave its exact categorization for another time), and I really don't exactly know what you mean by her \"hitting\" you (I'm not exactly sure I want to...), but they probably definitely consider what you're doing to be sexual in nature. This is probably more likely because it's apparently an activity that arouses you sexually; while it may or may not arouse her, in her parents' perception, it's still a sexual act for the two of you.

[Admiral Thrawn]

Dang!! I didn't know you guys were so young. So let's get this straight. You and this girl were sexually involved. She's religious, and her parents had a problem with your fetish?

You would think that Christian parents would be more concerned with their daughter having sex rather than the fetish. Or was it the the sex they had a problem with? Did they address that directly? Man, this could turn into a whole other discussion haha

[Flabby Chick]

I didn't know it was called shrimping! I also don't understand what all the fuss is about, unless there's an act with the same name that i'm unaware of. Go forth and shrimp my boy, nothing wrong wth it.

[Dakatsu]

Or was it the the sex they had a problem with?

We never had sex OR seen eachother naked, the farthest we have gone is making out, and making out while I am wearing handcuffs and she has a whip. They seem to be offened by the shrimping only, which made her aroused more than I did ironically, given the nature of my fetish. (Some girls LOVE it, some girls hate it) For sex, I don't plan on doing it anytime soon. I am sort of scared about the whole getting sent to jail for fifteen years, since I am the older kid by a month.

But either way, I will talk to her on Monday as I said. We both love eachother so much, it is just her parents, so I will have her talk to her parents about unbanning me from her house.

FYI: Shrimping = Sucking On a Girls Toes
That is so no one has to look it up again.

[Flabby Chick]

Ok thats cleared up. Shrimping is sucking toes...not sucking girls toes. I love having my toes sucked also, i don't consider that a fetish. As for religious taboos about it, i don't give a flying fig.

[Duper]

I'm right there with her folks. I have a teen age daughter and I'm not Roman Catholic. ...or any Catholic for that matter.

Hopefully, you'll understand one day. Most likey not for some time. Family changes you.

[Admiral Thrawn]

making out while I am wearing handcuffs and she has a whip

haha, man, the thought of two minors in leather and a whip. That's scary hehe. Well, it is good that you two haven't gotten involved in sexual relations, but it's still immoral considering the situation. Regardless of the religious nature of the parents, even if they weren't religious, they would have put a stop to it anyways if they are concerned parents.

[Dakatsu]

Hopefully, you'll understand one day. Most likey not for some time. Family changes you.

haha, man, the thought of two minors in leather and a whip. That's scary hehe. Well, it is good that you two haven't gotten involved in sexual relations, but it's still immoral considering the situation. Regardless of the religious nature of the parents, even if they weren't religious, they would have put a stop to it anyways if they are concerned parents.

I understand, but the thing is they didn't show any objection until they found out about my fetish and how I was shrimping her. I simply thought they wouldn't object. They even said a while ago they thought it was better for her to be hitting me than the other way around.

I just hope we can be together again. I know I sound as if we only do kissing and kinky things, but we love eachother to death. I have brought her out on dates and bought her presents. I know I have spent at least $2000 dollars on her, and considering my age, that is a lot. We help eachother on our homework, and we used to call eachother daily. TOmmorow hopefully, I can sort things out with her. Mainly this topic was to question the religion and fetishes, not about us breaking up. I know things will work out in the end.

[Shadowfury333]

Well, it is good that you two haven't gotten involved in sexual relations, but it's still immoral considering the situation.

That's right, because:

Every sperm is sacred
Every sperm is good
Every sperm is needed
In your neighbourhood

Every sperm is sacred
Every sperm is great
If a sperm is wasted
God gets quite irate

[Top Gun]

I have an honest question for you: Would you be willing to continue your relationship with her if it meant giving up your...activity? If the answer is no, then she's definitely not the girl for you.

[Dakatsu]

I would do ANYTHING for her. If it meant stopping for a while, it is a definite yes. As long as I am with her, and she is happy, I am happy.

[Kilarin]

IMHO what goes on behind closed doors is no business of the church.

Yes and no. I'm not an advocate of churches snooping around on their members. But, assuming that "what goes on behind closed doors" becomes public knowledge somehow, then of course the church has an interest in it. Membership in a church is a voluntary issue. You don't HAVE to belong, and they have every right to set their standards wherever they want.

If a church makes it a point of doctrine that you should only have sex while wearing a red and blue propeller beanie, and then at the church picnic the head elder and her husband are found caught "In flagrante delicto" making love in the gazeebo... WEARING PURPLE FEZ's!!!!

Well, the church has EVERY right to point out that if the indelicate couple didn't want to follow the church's rules, they shouldn't have joined, and to excommunicate them at once. Please note, I am NOT saying that would be the best approach. They should certainly consider disciplinary action and some time counseling with the pastor about the utter righteousness of propeller beanie sex as opposed to the complete degradation and horror of purple fez sex. BUT, that is an internal matter for the church. They are a private organization and have every right to deal with beanie coitus violations however they wish.

BUT, back on topic:
The Bible says NOTHING against toe sucking in particular. Actually, it's pretty clear that married couples should feel free to enjoy their sexuality with each other in very uninhibited ways. But it's very SOLID on the idea that sexual relationships belong within a marriage, and not outside those boundaries.

I would guess that the parents freaked out because they thought toe sucking was "weird" and more "serious" than they wanted their daughter to be getting. Which DOES seem a bit odd, since they weren't worried about her "making out" at 13. I think it would be hard for me to judge my reaction to this issue since I would have drawn the line before "making out" for any 13 year old kid of mine.

I guess the point I'm trying to make is twofold:

Once you are married, if your wife enjoys having her toes sucked, go for it. Read "Song of Solomon" sometime, especially in a modern translation. The book is erotica, plain and simple. And you are missing most of the erotic symbolism because the meaning of so many metaphors and euphemisms have changed. God approves of sex! He invented it.

But if you aren't married, and especially if you are only 13, you would (IMHO), be well served to back off on the physical side of the relationship. You've got a lifetime to be a grownup. Enjoy just being a kid.

[Lothar]

The Bible says NOTHING against toe sucking in particular.

Nothing at all.

I would guess that the parents freaked out because they thought toe sucking was "weird" and more "serious" than they wanted their daughter to be getting.

Yep. I don't think I'd particularly mind my 13-year-old daughter kissing a boy, but "making out" would be over the line, and toe-sucking would definitely be out. That would cross the line from "boy likes my daughter" to "boy is doing weird stuff with my daughter and that's freaky"...

[Zuruck]

What's the big deal with toes? She's not sucking off the entire 7th grade football team while doing lines of coke off her geometry book. So fricken what...get a grip people, it's not the end of the world. If that's ALL they do at 13 fine, let 'em wait till they have cars to get laid.

[Sir Sam II]

Dakatsu, just trying to help & be a brother to you here. Regardless of anyway someone was brought up, everyone women, especially 13yrs old deserves to be treated with respect & honor. Regardless of what they want physically (in example they were raised without standards or Godly examples in their life), it is still your part to be strong, & it show repsect, honor, & integrity on your part. If you really love her & I'll go with Top Guns question here. \"Would you be willing to continue your relationship with her if it meant giving up your...activity?\" If the answer is no, then you need to rethink the real reasons for you wanting to pursue any relationships for that matter. I know you said yes you would, but you said \"for a while.\" Does that imply that after a certain point maybe when you felt you've been in the relationship for a significant amount of time that its ok to do that regardless. I know these are tough & touchy subjects, but sometimes in life to do things right you have to sacrifice your fleshly desires. Especially at your age & with the pure pressure & influence that is all around you. From personal experience I can tell you it has been one of the hardest & one of the things that I get pretty ticked over sometimes because its just so hard at times to put down my fleshly physical desires. I am to be getting married in the summer soon, & I am so thankful to God & honored that I can tell her(who she can say the same), that she will be my first & my last in the physical realm. Its a hard long road, but strive for that beautiful ending that is only the beginning. Even the times we may fail God is there to pick us backup again, we just have to ask him. To really get through this situation to understand I can only tell you about the helper Psalm 27:9, Psalm 118:7. The Bible says that, (John 3) all have sinned & fallen short of glory of God, but the gift of God is eternal salvation through Jesus Christ, that whosover shall call up on the name of the Lord shall be saved, he wants to help you. I can only tell you how to get there, the rest is up to you. Let me know if you want to talk more personally.

[Dakatsu]

I know you said yes you would, but you said \"for a while.\" Does that imply that after a certain point maybe when you felt you've been in the relationship for a significant amount of time that its ok to do that regardless.

I mean't that if we are in our own house, married, and living life together, her parents are not allowed to tell me what I can't do to her toes. I could wait till that time however.

I love this girl so much though. In fact, she originally hated me. I begged her and begged her to go out with me, and she would just slap me. I was sort of ugly though, I had pimples, was really pale, and sort of fat. But I got Oxy Pads, started to get a tan, and lost weight. It costed about $700-800 dollars that I had to earn for all the stuff I bought, but it worked. She agreed to go out with me. She immediatly fell in love with me as I did with her. We have been like that for eight months.

I also talked to her, and she said her parents were more just creeped out. She lied to them, saying she asked me to do it because she heard from a friend it felt good. Either way, soon I should be allowed to see her!

P.S.: What is a syst? My mom says she has one in her face, I don't have any idea what it is, can someone answer this in their next reply.

[Shadowfury333]

P.S.: What is a syst? My mom says she has one in her face, I don't have any idea what it is, can someone answer this in their next reply.

A cyst is a closed sac having a distinct membrane and developing abnormally in a cavity or structure of the body. Cysts may occur as a result of a developmental error in the embryo during pregnancy or they may be caused by infections. However, they sometimes arise spontaneously with no apparent cause. Cysts may often be dangerous as they may have negative effects on the nearby tissue. They may contain air, fluids, or semi-solid material.

Thanks Wikipedia.

[Dakatsu]

Oh yay... that makes me feel joyous.

[Mobius]

Words from the wise.

When my father retired from 35 years of General Medical Practice as a GP, I asked him what the single biggest health issue was during his long career. He answered immediately, and with just a single word:

\"Catholicism\".

This from a man who holds a Masters degree in Theology, a Bachelors degree in Moral Philosophy, an MD in medicine, and a post-graduate diploma in obstetrics.

[Zuruck]

He's wrong Mobius. Haven't you figured that out by now? God only loves, saves, and makes this whole world a happy, fun loving place. No death, anger, or hate in this world.

[Sir Sam II]

God isn't a religion, hes a relationship. If you run after religion you'll be running after a never ending debate an unfullfilled happiness till the end of your time.

[Zuruck]

Well then Sam I guess I'll live my life the way I want to and in the end it doesn't really matter because I'll be dead anyways...

[Lothar]

How do any of the previous half dozen posts relate to toe-sucking?

[Jeff250]

Yes! We want pictures!

[Top Gun]

Words from the wise.

When my father retired from 35 years of General Medical Practice as a GP, I asked him what the single biggest health issue was during his long career. He answered immediately, and with just a single word:

"Catholicism".

This from a man who holds a Masters degree in Theology, a Bachelors degree in Moral Philosophy, an MD in medicine, and a post-graduate diploma in obstetrics.

Ah, anti-Catholicism. One of the few forms of bigotry that still goes largely without reproach or correction.

[dissent]

How do any of the previous half dozen posts relate to toe-sucking?

Well, it's perfectly obvious to me ...

...oh; toe-sucking ... nevermind!

[Kilarin]

Yes! We want pictures!

Please, for ALL of our sakes, NO PICTURES of geeks sucking toes!!!!

Could we put that in the forum rules somewhere?