I am Sorry.......

BfDiDDy · Post by **BfDiDDy** » Sat Jun 26, 2004 11:27 pm

If any of my posts are becoming more nasty. It might be becuase I am addicted to masturbation, and I am trying to quit.*sniff*I have joined AAM (Another Anonymous Masturbator), but I dont think its working. I need your help and support. I cant take it anymore. Everytime I turn on the t.v. all I see is pus.. um I mean pretty ladies. Everytime I go anywhere I start picturing these bitc... Oops I mean ladies in provocative positions. Even ugly ones are starting to look good to me now. I have almost fell of the wagon a couple times.*sniff*. Last night I discovered the "Hoooray for Canada!!" thread in the NHB and I almost busted a nut.*sniff* Damn you peoples sexual postings! At least I am having great dreams, but I think they are going to start turning wet pretty soon. I know I have to get rid of this "I am a Masturbator, and I am Proud" Mentallity, but its Hard(heh, I said Hard) What can I do? Any Advice from fellow Masturbators?

Ferno · Post by **Ferno** » Sat Jun 26, 2004 11:31 pm

LMAO.. classic dude.. just classic

JMEaT · Post by **JMEaT** » Sat Jun 26, 2004 11:45 pm

Rooofffffflllll

XSabre · Post by **XSabre** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 12:35 am

ROFL!

Avder · Post by **Avder** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 12:40 am

I'm gonna go whack off now.

Gooberman · Post by **Gooberman** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 1:31 am

Yeah for Cures, Watch the Graham Norton show.

Also, stay away from sexually provocative shows like Bay Watch, Xena Warrior princess, and Telletubies.

Further, I recommend only playing video games with dudes, so no more UT2k4, Final Fantisy 23^35, and Mrs.Pacman.

Arbitar · Post by **Arbitar** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 1:35 am

LMAO HAHAHAHA Mrs Pacman HAHAHAHA that little yellow dot is just too much HAHAHA

Gooberman · Post by **Gooberman** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 2:44 am

She has a pretty mouth.

Lothar · Post by **Lothar** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 2:51 am

I hope Xciter doesn't catch me linking to this:

Ms Pac-Man pics

It won't be up for long.

Dedman · Post by **Dedman** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 5:31 am

Get a cat and pretend you are a fighter pilot. I hear that works well.

AceCombat · Post by **AceCombat** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 9:41 am

hahahaha!!! maybe this explains your sudden hatred at me.

LOL Ded

TheCops · Post by **TheCops** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 11:05 am

my right hand is better than any woman i’ve ever had.... as far as getting to the finish line concerned. i just wonder how you deal with prince albert bro.

Scratch · Post by **Scratch** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 12:18 pm

Well admittng you have a problem was the firs step. Next, you need to release that song you've had in your head "It's midnight in Montana and I can't get my d!ck out of this cow."

Third, have a Dr. Pepper.

I'm proud of you D. You bring hope to all the chronic masturbators out there...."I'm BFDiddy ...and I love internet porn."

kurupt · Post by **kurupt** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 12:43 pm

i also have a super secret confession to make.

i am in love with carter.

i'm sorry goob.

Cuda68-2 · Post by **Cuda68-2** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 1:55 pm

Draw a face on the palm of your hand with open mouth

BfDiDDy · Post by **BfDiDDy** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 2:31 pm

Palmela Handerson?

Battlebot · Post by **Battlebot** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 3:01 pm

Beowulf · Post by **Beowulf** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 4:03 pm

Heh!!!

Nexus_One · Post by **Nexus_One** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 4:48 pm

try Crisco, it only gets better as it gets warmer

AceCombat · Post by **AceCombat** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 5:47 pm

Nexus_One wrote:try Crisco, it only gets better as it gets warmer

WTF

Sage · Post by **Sage** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 6:17 pm

lol crisco

Dedman · Post by **Dedman** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 6:18 pm

I think he is right.

Flatlander · Post by **Flatlander** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 6:41 pm

...off to the grocery store...

MD-2389 · Post by **MD-2389** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 11:05 pm

LMFAO

You guys are too much.

BfDiDDy · Post by **BfDiDDy** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 11:11 pm

Kurupt said it was a bad idea to jerk off with the warming KY stuff.... He gets lots of free lub.

Vertigo 99 · Post by **Vertigo 99** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 11:22 pm

the best thing ever: giving yourself a "stranger."

Jon the Great · Post by **Jon the Great** » Sun Jun 27, 2004 11:36 pm

wrong forum?

MD-2389 · Post by **MD-2389** » Mon Jun 28, 2004 12:17 am

Jon the Great wrote:wrong forum?

Psst! If it was in the wrong forum I would have moved it. Its just fine where it is.

HaAGen DaZS · Post by **HaAGen DaZS** » Mon Jun 28, 2004 10:32 am

Vertigo 99 wrote:the best thing ever: giving yourself a "stranger."

as in, sitting on your arm for an hour so that it goes numb, and when you do touch da wang it feels like someone else's arm?

kurupt · Post by **kurupt** » Mon Jun 28, 2004 2:20 pm

indeed. i am sponsored by KY jelly (tm).

Scratch · Post by **Scratch** » Mon Jun 28, 2004 2:44 pm

K, I thought you were sponsored by astro-glide?

kurupt · Post by **kurupt** » Mon Jun 28, 2004 2:58 pm

shh, if they find out i'll lose both.

Scratch · Post by **Scratch** » Mon Jun 28, 2004 7:18 pm

Oh right on. Gotta have the KY for one hand and the astroglide for the other

Gotcha!

Stupid · Post by **Stupid** » Mon Jun 28, 2004 7:38 pm

Well... maybe it's that I'm unmarried, and maybe I missed something someplace else... but don't you have a wife? Did it turn out that she closed the doors so that instead of them being open like a 7-11, they're only open for an hour one day per week? If so... sucks to be you. Maybe you could get her to entertain you with a real "stranger" instead of the above-mentioned one? If not, you may as well resign yourself to your tendencies and just don't worry about them so much.

Top Wop · Post by **Top Wop** » Mon Jun 28, 2004 9:37 pm

My grocery list for the day as I arrived at the checkout lane:

6 Biscuts
A pack of bacon
A bottle of whole milk
A box of tissue paper
A roll of paper towels
Crisco Oil
FHM and Stuff magazines

And I got a funny look from the chick at the register.

Vertigo 99 · Post by **Vertigo 99** » Tue Jun 29, 2004 12:26 am

HaAGen DaZS wrote:
Vertigo 99 wrote:the best thing ever: giving yourself a "stranger."
as in, sitting on your arm for an hour so that it goes numb, and when you do touch da wang it feels like someone else's arm?

YES

i didn't remember writing that post. i may have been inebriated at the time; and i may have been in the process of giving myself one.

durrr... :\