Help me please (rant)

MehYam · Post by **MehYam** » Fri Dec 24, 2004 10:39 pm

I'm having a holiday from hell. Relatives are drinking themselves into stupors, friends of the family are hitting on me (lose your husband lady, and maybe about 35 years... yeeckk), and I'm starting to feel like I'm the sane one on this godforsaken planet. Holy ----st. It's -27C (about -20F) so it's too cold to escape the house for long unless I borrow someone's car, or just steal their keys when they get drunk and fall down.

I may have to kill them all. I'm starting to hear voices, and am developing new facial ticks. Not good. I only have another thirty seconds to use this @#$@#% crappy web connection before Ms. Retired Grabby Fingers Robinson comes back downstairs, so please remember me in case I don't make it back.

- hating Xmas in Armpit, Ontario, Canada

STRESSTEST · Post by **STRESSTEST** » Fri Dec 24, 2004 10:40 pm

EVERYONE NEEDS TO DO A MOM

MehYam · Post by **MehYam** » Fri Dec 24, 2004 10:41 pm

STRESSTEST wrote:EVERYONE NEEDS TO DO A MOM

But not a grandmom.

Vindicator · Post by **Vindicator** » Fri Dec 24, 2004 10:46 pm

Tonight, I drink to you.

Hostile · Post by **Hostile** » Fri Dec 24, 2004 11:02 pm

You are a da*n good looking man Kai. Why wouldn't they hit on you?

CDN_Merlin · Post by **CDN_Merlin** » Fri Dec 24, 2004 11:16 pm

Mehyam, how far are you from Ottawa Ontario?

BTW: Merry Xmas.

bash · Post by **bash** » Fri Dec 24, 2004 11:58 pm

I don't know what it is about Christmas that brings out the letch in older women but I sympathize with you, Kai. I got groped by a woman with an oxygen mask. Felt like Blue Velvet in reverse. :fear: Hang in there and fart alot.

BUBBALOU · Post by **BUBBALOU** » Sat Dec 25, 2004 5:15 am

MILF...rofl.. take out the dentures...Whoooot

Avder · Post by **Avder** » Sat Dec 25, 2004 6:07 am

MehYam wrote:...Relatives are drinking themselves into stupors...

So get em more booze so they pass out.

and personally, if it wasnt for the joys of alchohol, I wouldnt be able to stand my family at all on Christmas. i think I dove through 5 Screwdrivers, 2 glasses of Wine, and a fewe cups of coffee spiked with irish creame liquer. I made damn sure I was inebriated enough to actually smile around the filthy bastards.

HaAGen DaZS · Post by **HaAGen DaZS** » Sat Dec 25, 2004 8:29 am

too bad at most I'd get a glass of champgne or wine from my family, otherwise I suppose I'd probably enjoy christmas a bit more - as ungrateful as it sounds. :\

TheCops · Post by **TheCops** » Sat Dec 25, 2004 8:33 am

bash wrote: Felt like Blue Velvet in reverse.

"LET'S FCUK!!!! I'LL FCUK ANYTHING THAT MOVES!"

rofl!

sheepdog · Post by **sheepdog** » Sat Dec 25, 2004 9:58 pm

bash wrote: I got groped by a woman with an oxygen mask.

LOL! That's gross Bash! And it's not being of an age as much as it is being of legal drinking age. The glow of the Christmas cheer and all that...

Mehyam, if all else fails, lock yourself in the bathroom and pretend to puke. It worked for me back in the day when dirty old men got drunk and played grabass at Chistmas.

Beowulf · Post by **Beowulf** » Sun Dec 26, 2004 3:26 pm

Tell them that Old Country Buffet is going out of business...they'll die from shock.

Easily fixed.

MehYam · Post by **MehYam** » Mon Dec 27, 2004 2:50 pm

Thank Buddha, I'm back home.

lol @ Bash and Host. The problem is, my farts would have to overpower hers.

Merl, it was Sudbury, where I was born and where half my family still lives (the crazy half).

Avder, that's exactly what I had to do. I got fed up trying to set the good example of sobriety in a crazy family of people who shouldn't touch the stuff... after a couple shots of lime Finlandia, the insane asylum got a lot more tolerable, and I even enjoyed myself.

If the saying about deserving the family you're born into is true, I must have been a Nazi in my past life.

Help me please (rant)

Help me please (rant)

Re: Help me please (rant)