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Robins Williams Peace Plan

Posted: Sun Apr 18, 2004 11:27 am
by Couver_
Hope this isn't a repost. Was gonna put it in the how others view the US thread but it was a snooch off topic...

THE ROBIN WILLIAMS PEACE PLAN

This may very well be the best thought out item we have read since 9/11/01.
Leave it to Robin Williams to come up with the perfect plan ... what we need now is for our UN Ambassador to stand up and repeat this message.

I see a lot of people yelling for peace but I have not heard of a plan for peace. So, here's one plan.

1. The US will apologize to the world for our "interference" in their affairs, past &present. You know, Hitler, Mussolini, Tojo, Noriega, Milosovich and the rest of those good ol' boys: We will never "interfere" again.

2. We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting with Germany, South Korea and the Philippines. They don't want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No one sneaking through holes in the fence.

3. All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together and leave. We'll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of who or where they are. France would welcome them.


4. All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 days unless given a special permit. No one from a terrorist nation would be allowed in. If you don't like it there, change it yourself and don't hide here. Asylum would never be available to anyone. We don't need any more cab drivers or 7-11 cashiers.

5. No "students" over age 21. The older ones are the bombers. If they don't attend classes, they get a "D" (for "deport") and it's back home baby.

6. The US will make a strong effort to become self-sufficient energy wise. This will include developing non-polluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while.

7. Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 a barrel for their oil. If they don't like it, we go some place else. They can go somewhere else to sell their production. (About a week of the wells filling up the storage sites would be enough.)

8. If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the world, we will not "interfere." They can pray to Allah or whomever for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides, most of what we give them is stolen or given to the Army. The people who need it most get very little, if anything.

9. Ship the UN Headquarters to an isolated island some place. We don't need the spies and fair weather friends here. Besides, the building would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens.

10. All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way no one can call us "Ugly Americans" any longer. The language we speak is ENGLISH.....learn it...or LEAVE...

Now, ain't that a winner of a plan.
The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying "Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses." She's got a baseball bat and she's yelling, "You want a piece of me?"

Posted: Sun Apr 18, 2004 11:44 am
by bash
I'm sure it won't come as a surprise but I love it. :D

Posted: Sun Apr 18, 2004 11:59 am
by TheCops
robin williams the famous actor?

Posted: Sun Apr 18, 2004 12:14 pm
by bash
Actually it's been *snoped* as not being authored by Robin Williams (except the very last joke about the Statue of Liberty, which was taken from one of his comedy routines).

Posted: Sun Apr 18, 2004 12:25 pm
by Krom
Amusing, but like hollywood just another predictible formula.

-Krom

Posted: Sun Apr 18, 2004 12:33 pm
by TheCops
bash wrote:Actually it's been *snoped* as not being authored by Robin Williams (except the very last joke about the Statue of Liberty, which was taken from one of his comedy routines).
well that's what i kinda thought. the internet is so full of this crap. if you have a funny thing to write... use your own name. quit with the bending of reality... that's just weak.

Posted: Sun Apr 18, 2004 12:36 pm
by bash
My guess is it started out anonymous and someone spotted the last joke and assumed it was all Robin Williams. I don't see a conspiracy as much as a case of mistaken identity.

Posted: Sun Apr 18, 2004 12:38 pm
by TheCops
bash you are satan. you want my soul. :P

Posted: Sun Apr 18, 2004 12:41 pm
by bash
Na, but next time do your own homework. :P

Posted: Sun Apr 18, 2004 8:00 pm
by roid
ya the last one does sound like robin williams (the other's sure don't, where's the honest funny?).
so maybe we should just concentrate on the last point for this thread?
the last point i do agree with.

i find it ironic that the statue of liberty is french.

trivia: robbin williams is a big internet culture consumer, he is a dedicated CS player and everything.
he says ppl never believe him when he says he's robin williams online anyway so he thinks this is especialy cool ;).

Posted: Mon Apr 19, 2004 4:37 pm
by MD-2389
I know for a fact the Statue of Libery bit is by Robin himself since he used it word for word on his "Broadway Live" DVD.