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American History
Posted: Fri Oct 02, 2009 1:11 pm
by Spaceboy
Subject:American History
The teacher said, \"Let's begin by reviewing some American History.\"
Who said 'Give me Liberty , or give me Death'?\"
She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Little Johnny, a bright Navajo Indian boy, who had his
hand up: 'Patrick Henry, 1775' he said.
'Very good!'
Who said, 'Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from
the Earth?'
Again, no response except from Little Johnny, 'Abraham Lincoln, 1863'.
The teacher snapped at the class, 'Class, you should be ashamed, Little Johnny knows
more about history than you do.'
She heard a loud whisper: 'Screw the Indians,' 'Who said that?' she demanded.
Little Johnny put his hand up, 'General Custer, 1862.'
At that point, a student in the back said, 'I'm gonna puke.'
The teacher glares around and asks, 'All right!!! Now who said that!?'
Again, Little Johnny says, 'George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991.'
Now furious, another student yells, 'Oh yeah? Suck this!'
Little Johnny jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher , 'Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!'
Now with almost mob hysteria someone said 'You little -blam!-. If you say anything else, I'll kill you.'
Little Johnny frantically yells at the top of his voice, ' Michael Jackson to the child witnesses testifying against him- 2004.'
The teacher fainted.
And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, 'Oh -blam!-, We're screwed!'
Little Johnny said quietly, \"The American people, November 4, 2008\".
I know it's copypasta but
I don't dislike Obama by the way, but it was still funny to me.
Posted: Fri Oct 02, 2009 1:17 pm
by Tunnelcat
Ohhhhhhh, you should have put this one in E&C.
Re:
Posted: Fri Oct 02, 2009 1:21 pm
by Spaceboy
tunnelcat wrote:Ohhhhhhh, you should have put this one in E&C.
I realized that after. >.<
How ironic would that be if a joke turned into a heated political debate?
...Then again it's probably happened here a couple of times.
Re:
Posted: Fri Oct 02, 2009 1:57 pm
by Isaac
tunnelcat wrote:Ohhhhhhh, you should have put this one in E&C.
I dont' think so. It's just another anti obama thing: dead horse.
Posted: Fri Oct 02, 2009 3:30 pm
by Stroodles
Okay, that's classic.
Posted: Mon Oct 05, 2009 12:05 am
by Spaceboy
Here's another...
Two blind pilots both are wearing dark glasses, one is using a guide dog, and the other is tapping his way along the aisle with a cane.
Nervous laughter spreads through the cabin, but the men enter the cockpit, the door closes, and the engines start up. The passengers begin glancing nervously around, searching for some sign that this is just a little practical joke. None is forthcoming.
The plane moves faster and faster down the runway and the people sitting in the window seats realize they're headed straight for the water at the edge of the airport. As it begins to look as though the plane will plough in to the water, panicked screams fill the cabin. At that moment, the plane lifts smoothly into the air. The passengers relax and laugh a little sheepishly, and soon all retreat into t heir magazines, secure in the knowledge that the pl ane is in good hands.
In the cockpit, one of the blind pilots turns to the other and says,\"ya know, Bob, one of these days, they're gonna scream too late and we're all gonna die.\"
Posted: Mon Oct 05, 2009 1:43 am
by Sirius
It's a good joke, but of course it was only some of America that was thinking that.