DescentBB

Curiosity killed my cat
What was your cat doing on mars?

Add more:

Make the little things count
teach midgets math.

What do you call a black man selling drugs?
A pharmacist, you racist.

I asked my friend from New Zealand how many sexual partners he's had
he started counting and fell asleep.

Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 was a registered 6 offender.

Your mother.

How To Clean A Cat

Thoroughly clean the toilet.

Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water, and have both lids lifted.

Obtain the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.

In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids.

Note: You may need to stand on the lid so that he cannot escape.

CAUTION: Do not get any part of your body
too close to the edge, as his paws will be
reaching out for any surface they can find.

Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "power wash and rinse" which I have found to be quite effective.

Have someone to open the door to the outside and ensure that there are no people between the toilet and the outside door.

Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.

The now-clean cat will rocket out of the toilet, and run outside where he will dry himself.

Sincerely,
the Dog

tunnelcat wrote: How To Clean A Cat

Overly Manly Man:

Found a couple of really bad jokes.


Dear Algebra,

Stop asking me to find your x.
She's not coming back.

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There are 3 kinds of people in this world. Those that are good at math, and those that aren't.

tunnelcat wrote:There are 3 kinds of people in this world. Those that are good at math, and those that aren't.

There are 10 kinds of people in the world: those that know binary and those that don't.

Think outside the quadrilateral parallelogram.

Why did they stop having pie eating contests in Alabama?

Because the cows kept stepping on their heads.

why did the chicken cross the road?

to commit suicide by truck.

snoopy wrote:There are 10 kinds of people in the world: those that know binary and those that don't.

There are only 10 types of people in the world - those who understand ternary, those who don't, and those who mistake it for binary

Teacher: "Who can tell me what 7 times 6 is?"
Student: "It's 42!"
Teacher: "Very good! - And who can tell me what 6 times 7 is?"
Same student: "It's 24!"

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Q: Why did the topologist's marriage fail?
A: Because he thought that arbitrary unions were open.

tunnelcat wrote:Q: Why did the topologist's marriage fail?
A: Because he thought that arbitrary unions were open.

I like that one.

Explain this one:

Q: What is the fundamental principle of engineering mathematics?
A: Every function has a Taylor series which converges to the function and breaks off after the linear term.

Heh, that one is basically about the way engineers estimate. It could be reworded, "Engineers see every function as a set of terms, but they only use the first high-order one.".

knock knock
whos there
KGB
KG(interrupts and says)
WE ASK THE QUESTIONS

Foil wrote:

tunnelcat wrote:Q: Why did the topologist's marriage fail?
A: Because he thought that arbitrary unions were open.

I like that one.

tunnelcat wrote:Explain this one:

Q: What is the fundamental principle of engineering mathematics?
A: Every function has a Taylor series which converges to the function and breaks off after the linear term.

Foil wrote:

tunnelcat wrote:Q: Why did the topologist's marriage fail?
A: Because he thought that arbitrary unions were open.

I like that one.

Hey... hey. hey guys. help. explain, make us smarter pls
pls.
pls smarties, pls.

Foil wrote:Heh, that one is basically about the way engineers estimate. It could be reworded, "Engineers see every function as a set of terms, but they only use the first high-order one.".

Oooooooooooh! Now I get it.

Bones McCoy wrote:I know engineers, they love to change things.