Faith
Posted: Thu Jul 28, 2005 11:33 pm
I wrote this in October, 2003 ... Right as I was struggling about what to do about the horrible situation we had at home. Most of you know that I divorced the woman and got custody of the kids ... I am putting this here for you to see if you are interested. I am not going to debate it but I have no problem with you guys debating it. I just wanted to share it because it was a huge moment in my life. I believe that God filled this woman with the Holy Spirit and sent her to that office specifically to deliver a message for me. I believe it was truly a miracle.
[quote]
Faith
Anonymous
10/2003
I was in the foyer of my attorneyâ??s office sitting on a comfortable green couch next to the front door. The door had window panes on one side and the bright afternoon son was penetrating them with strong rays of yellow light. As I pondered the outcome of what I was about to do, my stomach started churning. The emotional pain I felt inside was intensifying and manifested itself in a nearly uncontrollable urge to throw up. I had the beginnings of the evidence I needed to show that my wife had abandoned my children and I in favor of an alternate lifestyle that included alcohol, drugs, and adultery. I had brought this evidence for my attorney in hopes that she would help me protect my children from the horrible circumstances they had endured for the past six weeks. Yet, the thought of taking them away from their mother sickened me.
It just didnâ??t seem right; taking two young girls away from their mother. They had depended on this woman all of their life and as dysfunctional as their relationship was they still loved her deeply. For several days now I had heard Godâ??s requests for me to walk through this dark valley of despair and frankly I was terrified of granting his wishes. At times I became angry with him and I even questioned his very existence. Other times I was so afraid of the pain my children and I would feel that I questioned his ability to prevail in our situation. I needed clarification. I needed for God to tell me exactly what it was he wanted me to do. I needed for God to bolster my faith so that I could follow his plan and trust him to protect us. I needed a miracle of faith â?¦
Unable to stand the pain and sickness I was feeling, I put my elbows on my knees and bowed my head into my hands. I began to pray, asking God to tell me in clear terms exactly what it was he wanted me to do. As I began pleading for him to give me faith the office door opened and a woman about ten or fifteen years my senior stepped inside. As she stopped in the doorway the sunlight radiated around her head and formed a perfect white halo. She looked directly into my eyes and with the most beautiful voice I have ever heard she asked â??Sir are you all right?â?
[quote]
Faith
Anonymous
10/2003
I was in the foyer of my attorneyâ??s office sitting on a comfortable green couch next to the front door. The door had window panes on one side and the bright afternoon son was penetrating them with strong rays of yellow light. As I pondered the outcome of what I was about to do, my stomach started churning. The emotional pain I felt inside was intensifying and manifested itself in a nearly uncontrollable urge to throw up. I had the beginnings of the evidence I needed to show that my wife had abandoned my children and I in favor of an alternate lifestyle that included alcohol, drugs, and adultery. I had brought this evidence for my attorney in hopes that she would help me protect my children from the horrible circumstances they had endured for the past six weeks. Yet, the thought of taking them away from their mother sickened me.
It just didnâ??t seem right; taking two young girls away from their mother. They had depended on this woman all of their life and as dysfunctional as their relationship was they still loved her deeply. For several days now I had heard Godâ??s requests for me to walk through this dark valley of despair and frankly I was terrified of granting his wishes. At times I became angry with him and I even questioned his very existence. Other times I was so afraid of the pain my children and I would feel that I questioned his ability to prevail in our situation. I needed clarification. I needed for God to tell me exactly what it was he wanted me to do. I needed for God to bolster my faith so that I could follow his plan and trust him to protect us. I needed a miracle of faith â?¦
Unable to stand the pain and sickness I was feeling, I put my elbows on my knees and bowed my head into my hands. I began to pray, asking God to tell me in clear terms exactly what it was he wanted me to do. As I began pleading for him to give me faith the office door opened and a woman about ten or fifteen years my senior stepped inside. As she stopped in the doorway the sunlight radiated around her head and formed a perfect white halo. She looked directly into my eyes and with the most beautiful voice I have ever heard she asked â??Sir are you all right?â?